"Jesus didn't come to get you out of the pain of life; He has come to live in you through it." Dr. Frank Gripka
This is from an excerpt from "When a Woman trusts God" By Sheila Walsh.
My reading today was Ephesians 1 (the whole chapter). It was all about trusting God. Hmmm. You think God is trying to say something to me? DUH! All these months of showing me places in my heart that needs weeding out. Places that I had kept under my control rather than give it to Him.
Tonight my heart was breaking. Things that you don't want to happen in life, they happen anyway. It's how we deal with them that speaks to where we are in our spiritual walk. Tonight, I just ran to Jesus. I am giving him these offerings of my fears. These fears that have been with me all my life. The fear of being happy. Seems so stupid to be afraid of being happy, but all during my childhood every time something good happened...well, something bad happened. It made me cringe from the happy. God has not called us to sit in corners cringing out of fear. He has called us to be more than conquerors!!! He has called us His beloved.
My heart that was broken, crushed, uprooted and replanted, it again is undergoing a deep pruning from the Master Gardner. Even as I am crushed a fragrance of submission fills the air, the delicate perfume of trust. It wafts up to my Shepherd and He smiles at me and asks, "Do you trust me?" I do Lord. I do. Take me where you will. I am here. Malleable. Joyful in knowing that you are taking me closer to the High Places. My heart bursts with incandescent joy. You love me. You desire my company. You will not harm me. You will protect me. You died for the protection of my heart. You yanked the keys of sin and death from the enemy of my soul. You rose up again, so that we may never be parted. You wait and come to bring me home. I wait with expectation of your Glory falling on me.
I do trust you. I am not so different from Much Afraid. Even though I am fighting the fear, I'd rather tremblingly give my heart and my hand to you than be parted from you. I love you Lord. Life my eyes to you so that I don't look down or around to where we are going, but that I only focus on you. Your love. Your peace. Your devotion to me. Reshape me. Fashion me into who you want me to be. I shall be content because I know you are creating me to be the person you always created me to be.
Selah.
